Okay I keep thinking that at some point I will know what to do, where to go, how to start over. I really don't know why it should have to be this hard. So I have my pity party again. I can be alone here or alone there or alone some other place. This alone stuff just sucks. I don't know why people choose not to have someone in their life intentionally. I hope you know that I am not talking about family or friends. I am blessed with an incredible family that I love so much and good friends too. It's just that it has been almost two years now since my world stopped revolving and I can't seem to get it back on track. Maybe I am sad after watching "Grey's Anatomy" tonight and seeing Izzy there hooked up to the chemo machines. It was all too familiar and it made me miss him all over again.
I realize that I dont have to make any decisions any time soon and that is a good thing since I am a bit off balance again since mom died. Thank God I have my cats ;-)and I can put on quite a good front. I really should have been an actress.
I will try to be more upbeat next post. In the meantime, hold each other close and cherish each minute God gives you together.
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